THE ILLURUNATI

THE ILLURUNATI

by Eddie Suarez

The Unwritten Rules of Running

1)   An event shirt cannot be worn until you have completed said event.

2)   Thou shall not wear one brand from head to toe.

3)   Anything said after Mile 8 cannot be used against you.

4)   Thou shall refer to your running shoes as shoes. They are neither sneakers nor tennis shoes.

5)   Yes it’s hot and humid, shut up and keep running.

6)   Relieving yourself on yourself is only acceptable if you’re in position to win the race.

7)   Any distance that is not 26.2 miles shall not be referred to as a marathon.

8)   Running two half-marathons does not mean you ran a marathon.

9)   If your Garmin didn’t record your run then it never happened.

10) Finisher medals for any race shorter than a half marathon shall be worn for the remainder of Race Day. For any race longer, the period is extended until the end of the following day.

What are some of your rules?

Comments

  1. bioprof
    bioprof 31 October, 2014, 18:34

    If the bone ain’t showing, keep on going.

    Reply this comment
    • Eddie Suarez
      Eddie Suarez Author 31 October, 2014, 18:38

      I don’t know about that. If anything on me is broken, I’m pretty much going to passout.

      Reply this comment
  2. Gabriel
    Gabriel 31 October, 2014, 20:05

    I like that and if it hurts, keep on running, it will either dissipate or hurt some more.

    Reply this comment
  3. Mar mar 44
    Mar mar 44 31 October, 2014, 23:12

    Don’t start a race with a group you can’t pace with

    Reply this comment
  4. Laura
    Laura 1 November, 2014, 11:40

    Love these rules, Eddie! I live by all of them (especially the one about the Garmin)

    Reply this comment
    • Eddie Suarez
      Eddie Suarez Author 3 November, 2014, 14:08

      Thanks Laura! Nothing is more frustrating than my Garmin running out of juice midway through a run…

      Reply this comment
  5. jp
    jp 3 November, 2014, 23:37

    Don’t assume the guy in front of you with the pace time is on his back is ACTUALLY WITH THE PACE GROUP in the marathon…..

    Reply this comment

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